Winning Either Way

President Bush is not often thought about as a master of linguistic subtlety but yesterday he managed a good one. The subject was the Iraq war funding bill that will now be passed without timelines or other such restrictions. Bush argues that this will give his troop-surge plan time to work. He also said this.

Mr. Bush warned today of still worse violence to come in Iraq in the months before Gen. David Petraeus is scheduled to report on progress there in September. “It could make August a tough month, because, you see, what they’re going to try to do is kill as many innocent people as they can to try to influence the debate here at home,” Mr. Bush said, referring to Al Qaeda and anti-American Iraqi militants. “Don’t you find that interesting -- I do -- that they recognize that the death of innocent people could shake our will?” source

Here's the translation.

• If violence in Iraq decreases between now and September, it will mean insurgents are on the run. Obviously, the surge is working.
• If violence in Iraq increases between now and September, it will mean insurgents are getting desperate. Obviously, the surge is working.

See, the Surge cannot fail. No matter what happens, Bush anticipated it and did the right thing. Nicely done! This is why we made this man our leader.

Hat tip to Darth Beckman.